Sunday, March 18, 2012

Leaving My Comfort Zone

This blog is about the time when I was still on my last year in high school till my first days in college. Well, I just want to remember it, that's why. 

I remember back then that I was kinda excited to leave my school and at the same time afraid of meeting new people. You see, I'm not the friendly type of person. I'm used to stay on the side and wait for people to approach me. But college is different. I know that If I didn't make a move, I'll be a loner my entire college life. So, I made a tough decision, not so hard but still: I need to talk more and approach other people more! So, my entire summer was wasted on me spacing out and thinking of things like this. Hehe, although I spend most of my time in front of the computer for browsing updates, pictures and videos of my beloved Hey! Say! JUMP. And we also went to Cebu and Bohol for a one week vacation. But every night before I sleep, I'm always thinking about this. Oh! And also, I know that I'm going to miss my high school group of friends. You see, we weren't able to bond for a long time because we only got close during the last part of the third semester.

Luckily or unluckily, I had this high school classmate of mine who happens to be my blockmate. But I guess, it ended up as a bad luck. Though, I was kinda thankful at first that I have someone to talk to during my lonely days in my college life, BUT, he always irritates me and nags me. Yeah! I know, I'm complaining again instead of being thankful, but hey! I do have a peaceful life that I wanted to have some time. So, moving on, during LPEP (orientation) days, I was with him. Luckily, there's this girl who approached him. You see, we were sitting and watching inside an auditorium for the first activity. So there's this girl, uhmmm, let's call her Autumn. So Autumn approached him and befriended him, then he introduced Autumn to me and we became friends instantly. Yeah, that fast. We were together and sitting beside each other during the classroom sessions. 

Yipee! I found a friend. Autumn is a funny and cheerful girl. She tells a lot of her high school experiences to me. I enjoyed her company and I was also thankful that she does most of the talking because I'm more comfortable on doing the listening. (Hehe, that's why I was kinda surprised when a friend of hers told Buttercup, and Buttercup told me, that she was a demure when she was still in high school.xD). 

Before our day ended, we also met another girl, that's where Buttercup comes in. Buttercup was with a certain guy most of the time (that's why I thought they're somewhat related by blood or by emotion, but she already told us that he was just a plain classmate from her sophomore days in high school). Nevertheless, we got close to her despite the fact of our assumption. Buttercup was a quiet girl; she looks very refined and observant that when I talked to her, I did most of the talking because it felt awkward to have a silence between us.

Until now, the three of us are still friends and close, although we were added in number, the three of us still remains stuck together. Autumn is still very cheerful and funny (although he hates this certain guy who we call Q), on the other hand, Buttercup uhmmm, changed? She was more talkative now and tells a lot of experiences, too. I learned that she was always like that; it's just that she was somewhat shy at first and observes a lot. Whew!

Haha, so maybe some of you wonders how I became close with them. I know, because some of our blockmates ask me the same question. But hey, if it weren't for these two, I'll be loner during my entire stay in college. So, I thank them a lot. I hope they can bear with me if I have a short temper sometimes or moody or any negative attitude that I have.=)

P.S.: If you know who the guy I'm talking about is, please don't tell him what I've said about him here. xD


Friday, March 9, 2012

The Way I See It.

Hi there! I'm back. Well, today, we had our community service in Quezon City and I'm with my college classmates. I'm really tired but there are a lot of things in my mind right now that I want to share.

First on the list will be my friends in high school. Actually there are seven of us, but now that we're already in college, we rarely see each other together. Sometimes by twos or threes, but never as a whole. So, time for making code names for them, they'll be: Khaki, Purple, Red, Ecru, Silver, and Auburn. Out of them, I'm closest with Khaki, though she's the eldest in the group and I'm the youngest (hehe). Anyways, I miss them a lot, especially Auburn and Ecru. We rarely communicate due to the hectic schedule that we have. Oh! How I miss bonding with them and laughing our heads off during lunches and breaks. I really hope to see them again.

Second will be my college friends. I know that they're a different set of people from my high school friends but I can't help but compare both groups. Honestly, I prefer my high school friends, but I'm not saying that I hate my college friends. It's just that there are still stuffs that they don't know about me and I'm not that confident to share these to them. I sometimes struggles to let them know how I feel not vocally but by my actions, but I guess, the message I want them to receive doesn't seem to reach them. Sometimes, I also disagree with their decisions but I just remain quiet and wait for them to ask about my opinion and share my thoughts, but most of the time I just get disappointed. Yeah. I know I have a lot of complain against them, but they're a bunch of sweet people that I can still rely on when I need it.

Third is my family. I'm not really the type of person who shares my thoughts to my mom, or communicates with my father about my problems or just telling my sisters my secrets. I'm the type of person who relies more on my friends than my family. I'm the eldest, so technically, a lot of expectations and responsibilities are on my shoulders. It's not that I can't do it, it's because I don't want to be pressured because I'm the type who works worse under pressure. I know some of my friends see me as a spoiled child but, in reality, I'm only spoiled to them because I kinda seek attention that I don't usually get from my family.

Last, I know a lot of fan girls feel the same way, but I sometimes daydream what will happen to my life when the time comes for me to meet him personally. I also think about what will I say, what will I wear. I'm planning way ahead that sometimes that it creeps me out because I don't know what'll happen to me if I receive disappointment. Nevertheless, I still hope that I'll see him and make him know my existence and remember me for the rest of his life. I know it sounds kinda impossible but I hope that at least the last part will happen. I want him to have a soft spot in his heart for me like the way I do.


Yeah, so that's what I think most of the time. It bugs me but I think a lot, even while typing this very blog, I'm thinking of other things. I sometimes wonder if my mind ever gets tired of too much thinking of a lot of things. I maybe kinda weird but that's me. So that's all for now. Wait for my next blog.=))))))

There's Always a First for Everything

Basically, this will be my first blog ever.. Well, as many of us do, I made this blog to express my feelings towards people or events that I don't or can't usually express to people around me, not because I don't trust them or like that, but because there are things that I usually wanted to keep to myself..xD

For special reasons, I go by the code name Spring Song. I like the mysterious effect... Hehe.. And I also like to express myself freely with no limitations and worries that people I know might find out about this..XD So, I'm a Chinese but was born in the Philippines. I am usually a moody but cheerful kid, a bright but lazy girl, and a secretive but trusted lady. I'm also a JPOP fan (especially Hey! Say! JUMP).


So, why did I made this blog?

Two people inspired me in doing this, two college friends to be exact. Let's call them Asteria and Buttercup (since they go with that initials, hehe). Asteria and Buttercup are a year older than me, but somehow, we get along a lot. I'm closer with Buttercup, and she was the one who shared to me about her and Asteria's blog. I tried reading both, though I'm not done yet (sorry), and I enjoyed and learned a lot of things about them that I usually don't see when I'm with them. So here it is: my first blog.

Great! I kinda feel relieved. Having a blog is good for the health. It lightens up the heavy feelings you had there inside you. So yeah. This ends it. Wait for my next blog to learn more about me.....=)))))))